If you keep having fights about the in-laws, it’s time to set some boundaries.
Talking Points:
- If you experience on-going conflict over the in-laws, chances are good that you have some boundary issues that need to be addressed.
- There are 3 key steps to help you navigate this issue in a manner that keeps your marriage intact while preserving relationships with your family.
- Take a look inward and discover what’s bothering you and why
- Talk honestly with your spouse about your feelings and concerns
- Create boundaries with each family and hold to them
Discussion:
- Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- Describe your typical experience with your family. How about with the in-laws. (holidays, family dinner, reunion). What are some pros and cons to each family?
- Do you notice your stress level rising when you’re about to spend time with either family? Explain. Do you notice your spouse’s stress level rising around family? Explain.
- What are the triggers that tend to upset you when you’re around family? Why do those things have such a negative impact on you?
- Of the 3 boundaries mentioned, (one or both act differently around family, ignore your spouse or triangulation) which one best describes your family dynamic? How is each one damaging to you?
- When is the last time you asked your spouse about what it’s like being around your family or theirs? How could being honest about the challenges help your marriage?
- What are some boundaries you need to put in place with your family? With your spouse’s family? How will you go about communicating those boundaries?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
