Mother-daughter relationships can be complicated and can do a lot of damage if the relationship is unhealthy and toxic.
Talking Points:
- There are 6 Unhealthy Mother-Daughter Relationships that you need to guard against.
- Bosom Buddies: The mother is more concerned about being the best friend than the parent who teaches life skills through discipline and guidance.
- Boss-Subordinate: The mother wants to control and dominate her daughter’s life, while the daughter feels the need to perform in order to win her mother’s affection and approval.
- Rivals: The mother sees the daughter as a rival or threat, causing her to constantly compare herself to her daughter.
- Role-Reversal: The daughter becomes the one who has to parent the mother, nurturing and providing emotional support while the mother only cares about her own needs.
- The Ghost: The mother can be physically and/or emotionally unavailable to her daughter by paying attention to other siblings over her, or leaving her with someone else.
- Good Mom/Bad Mom: This relationship is erratic with the mother often acting like the good mom in public while privately being dismissive, neglectful, and cold to her daughter.
Discussion:
- Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- Briefly describe your relationship with your mother. How would you describe your relationship with your daughter(s) right now?
- Why do you think moms and daughters often times have complicated relationships? What are some of the difficulties you are currently experiencing in relating to your daughter(s)?
- Of the 6 dynamics listed above, which ones most resonate with you and why? What do you want your relationship to look like with your daughter?
- If you find yourself relating to your daughter(s) in these unhealthy ways, what are some practical things you can do to change those dynamics?
- How do you think these unhealthy mother-daughter relationships can affect other family relationships?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
