Of the modes of persuasion furnished by the spoken word there are three kinds. The first kind depends on the personal character of the speaker; the second on putting the audience into a certain frame of mind; the third on the proof, provided by the words of the speech itself.

Talking Points:

  • Logos is the logic of the message. Make sure to think through your emotions before you confront your spouse. 
  • Ethos speaks to the credibility of the speaker. This speaks to trust – can your spouse trust that your heart is for the good of the marriage? 
  • Pathos speaks to the emotions of the listener. This is about being empathetic, thinking about the conflict from your spouse’s point of view, too.
Discussion:
  1. Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
  2. How do conflicts typically go between you and your spouse? What gets in the way of doing conflict in a healthy way?
  3. Which of the 3 components is easiest for you? Which is the hardest? Explain.
  4. How often do you take time to process your feelings before confronting your spouse? How could it help you in the future to order your thoughts before speaking?
  5. Evaluate yourself. In conflict, do you think your spouse trusts that you care about their perspective as much as your own? How could you show more humility and kindness in your next argument?
  6. Even in conflict, how can you show a desire to see your spouse’s point of view in a future conflict?
  7. Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?